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Under Some Dirty Words on a Dirty Wall. Eating Take-Out Alone

April 26th, 2006 by cooper

I have no agenda. I am not sure what peo­ple mean really, but in regard to the Duke case, my only agenda ori­gi­nally was to point out the sexist cul­ture we live in, expres­sed more often by the com­men­tary about women I see on blogs all over the place on posts surroun­ding the case ‚more than by the case itself, a case in which wit­nes­ses are being disc­re­di­ted daily.

Email from my mother — at our old home in Mary­land this week.

The lilacs are in bloom here. I know how you like to know when they are in bloom, even though you’re not here. I hope you get to see them this wee­kend. I know how happy they make you. Ima­gine the fra­grance darling.

I wish for a time when the smell of lilacs was all it took to make me happy.

Yes, she does call me dar­ling, espe­cially when she is in her pre 1970 movie mode. I love her anyway.


Oh no Things were loo­king up
Least that’s what I heard
Oh no Someone came and washed away
your hard-earned Peace of mind

ben folds

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14 Responses to “Under Some Dirty Words on a Dirty Wall. Eating Take-Out Alone”

  1. mojo shiversNo Gravatar says:

    Lately, I’ve been wishing I could go back to a time when the sim­ple plea­su­res suf­fi­ced. As I’ve got­ten older I’ve noti­ced how much effort it takes to get me to a place that only took ten seconds of doing something idio­tic and chil­dish when I was youn­ger. I’ve also noti­ced that the effect tends to wear off fas­ter than it did before. I think that everything I do now is in pur­suit of the ever­las­ting joy that ever­yone else seems to have. I want that more than anything else.

  2. DougNo Gravatar says:

    I think a bow­tie would make an exce­llent man-muzzle.

  3. LeighNo Gravatar says:

    Is being called “dar­ling” old fashion? One of my girl­friends calls me that
    all the time and I love it. I too wish the sim­pli­city of sme­lling a favo­rite
    scent could put me in an abso­lute state of hap­pi­ness. Perhaps for just
    a moment is does… kind of like the “dar­ling” thing.

  4. jacobNo Gravatar says:

    We all have an agenda but that’s ok
    I appre­ciate you taking time to make a blog about Dar­fur
    for the very rea­sons you gave ori­gi­nally for star­ting it.

    Thanks for sha­ring the email. Not often we get a look in.

    ” I so wish for a time when the smell of a lilac was all it took
    to make me happy.”

    That is the truth for many of us.

    We have a few lilac bushes and my wife has been cut­ting them
    daily.
    daily.

  5. danNo Gravatar says:

    I’m willing to bet lilac still brings a smile unbidden. :)

    As far as Duke, things will turn out as they will. Hope­fully it won’t go
    all OJ with riots and such. But I agree with you who­lehear­tedly, there
    are dee­per issues with what went on beyond did they or didn’t they.

    And although I believe in the Iraq war, the rea­sons I believe in it are
    the same rea­sons I sup­port action in Dar­fur… of any kind. And how
    such a mass geno­cide can go uncom­men­ted on shows the utter
    hypoc­risy of the current administration.

    Soap­box out.

  6. CowgirlNo Gravatar says:

    I have a large lilac bush that is right outside my house in bloom. I like to leave the win­dows open so their fra­grance fills the house. I abso­lu­tely love lilacs. I run a cer­tain path in town because of the lilacs (I am such a sap).

    I’m going to go take a pic­ture and post it on my blog.

  7. JasonNo Gravatar says:

    Oh, didn’t you get the memo…we’re all sup­po­sed to have an agenda these days…lol…I always won­der what peo­ple are thin­king when they throw that word out at someone…

    Oh, miss the smell of lilacs. And cherry blos­soms — which a lot of peo­ple say have no smell.

    Don’t eat too much take-out ;)

  8. Miz BoheMiaNo Gravatar says:

    I could have sworn I saw a com­ment by Pia but it isn’t there anymore!

    I am not par­ti­cu­lar to any flo­wer but a freak in that I can­not, can­not walk by them without snif­fing them to see if they have a scent. Flo­wers in San Fran­cisco almost never did but here they do… then the kids and Lover­boy are for­ced to sniff away…

    We have some Fun­da­men­tal Chris­tian friends who are like family and live in Hong Kong and the mother of the family always calls us and everything dar­ling. Yes, I said fun­da­men­tal Christiam=n which pretty much means that many sub­jects are off the table or else not much peace can be had. And I admire them for being wise enough to know that…

    See where men­tion of flo­wers takes us? Hmmm… dar­ling flowers! ;)

  9. cooperNo Gravatar says:

    mojo: I fear those days are gone gone gone. You can bring them back in your writing.

    Doug: That mouth needs something much lar­gers than a bow tie I fear.

    Leigh: Lots of my gay male friends call me that. My mother calls me that in a dif­fe­rent way.

    Jacob: I think ever­yone wants to smell the lilacs, or the roses or wha­te­ver. Or so it seems. Thanks, your wel­come and go cut some lilacs.

    Dan: A smile unbid­den for sure. It is what it is but is more indeed. Admit­tedly it is also the Ame­ri­can peo­ple who have a power to change that to a great degree and Con­die Rice has tried I give her that.

    miz Bohem: Pia com­men­ted below she always com­ments on the post below the current one…lol Cow­girl: The fra­grance is devine. I hope your birth­day went well.

    Jason: Well most
    peo­ple think an agenda is that black book thy carry with their sche­dule in it so most peo­ple do not even know what an agenda is. That makes me happy to have the other kind. Is there anything but take out?

  10. CoyotemikeNo Gravatar says:

    Daily pop in.

    Don’t think I have anything to add.

    Hug and thanks for the kind words on my blog.

  11. I may have made note that the term “Rape Cul­ture” is something I strug­gle with. And lately I’ve figu­red it out. It’s not that there is any ques­tion as to its exis­tance. There was never any ques­tion in my mind, dating back years. It’s that the term feels like an accu­sa­tion. And that is why peo­ple will accuse you of an agenda if you use it. It’s reci­pro­cal in their minds I think. Not that they’re jus­ti­fied. Because ever­yone should have an agenda where this is con­cer­ned and the agenda is to stop rape and making peo­ple uncom­for­ta­ble is colla­te­ral damage. And yet, there’s the risk one runs of alie­na­ting those who could be con­vin­ced to join the cause.

    It sucks. And who wouldn’t see that this situa­tion would. And I can’t pre­tend to having anything approaching an ans­wer. And telling peo­ple that by defa­ming someone for using the phrase rape cul­ture they’re vin­di­ca­ting the very per­son they’re defa­ming doesn’t seem to be a stra­tegy that will work.

    And I’m sorry that I said nothing to explain what I said when the term first came up. It’s not in kee­ping with my style.

    Also sorry that I’ve blog­ged in your com­ment section

  12. CowgirlNo Gravatar says:

    Somehow I don’t think Coop minds you blog­ging in her com­ment sec­tion Wombat.

  13. cooperNo Gravatar says:

    Coyote: Daily Pop in? lol I call them something simi­lar. Hope things are ok with the grandfather.

    Wom­bat: Many males seem to have a hard time with the term ” rape cul­ture”; it is not an accu­sa­tion but that may indeed be the way males take it. It is merely a sta­te­ment. A sta­te­ment of fact in my opi­nion. I do unders­tand your alie­na­tion theory though and it is a valid point. Some­ti­mes though terms that “jar” need to be used in order to pro­mote consideration.

    If I was going to choose anyone to blog in my com­ment sec­tion it would be you.

    Cow­girl: ditto.

  14. robotmanNo Gravatar says:

    We all have an agenda .