Wonderland or Not

It will be a come play with us, we see dead peo­ple, dirty pillows kind of night; so terrif­ying to think that evil could be stan­ding right next to you or even be you. You pray you are not evil or that if you are others won�t be able to tell.

The Village Parade pre­pa­ra­tions begin.

There are three things I have lear­ned never to dis­cuss with peo­ple: reli­gion, poli­tics, and the Great Pumpkin.

Linus

The Village Parade pre­pa­ra­tions begin. There are three things I have lear­ned never to dis­cuss with peo­ple: reli­gion, poli­tics, and the Great Pump­kin. Linus

The Great Pump­kin is only my second favo­rite Pea­nuts movie; it is either a great pump­kin tale in which we can make fun of peo­ple who believe in things that are not so, or it is one of the grea­test acts of sophistry of all time — not that it takes much with five year olds.

I do not believe in the Great Pump­kin; I have heard rumors being spread that would indi­cate other­wise, and I want to set the record straight. I will neither con­firm nor deny that I , one Hallo­ween eve when much youn­ger, clai­med to have wit­nes­sed the coming of the Great Pump­kin. We all did things when very young that we don’t lay claim to as adults, and as per­fect as I am I am no excep­tion; that is as it should be as per­fec­tion is boring and life without fan­tasy is just life.

I do apo­lo­gize to all my friends for mis­lea­ding them regar­ding the exis­tence of the GP, but please… to claim that you have been dama­ged for life due to my mis­lea­ding you in this regard is pure thea­trics on your part, his­trio­nics exem­pli­fied. I blame the likes of Dr Phil and Fox News for this type of thin­king, but face it most of you were crazy long before I met you.

The pres­sure (back in the day) to believe in the Great Pump­kin was often more than I could stand, so thro­wing out a sim­ple “yea he came to me too” was not really much of a stretch; it didn’t even seem like a lie really. I didn’t even start it; it was that really pale vam­pire toothed kid with the dark pur­plish eyes who star­ted it. I couldn’t help going a little further — I tend to lean toward desc­rip­tive speech and wan­ted ever­yone to know that if I saw the Great Pump­kin it was most assu­redly large, not quite round with long brown eye­lashes, wea­ring a pair of brown Doc Mar­tens and of the most vivid orange one could ever imagine.

I knew I would get you with the fact that he pas­sed out Nin­tendo games to his favo­rite kids. You would believe anything if it invol­ved those stu­pid video games.

Is it my fault you all bought every aspect of the decep­tion except the gen­der? I don’t think so. I still don’t unders­tand how you could believe there was a big magic pump­kin that came every Hallo­ween but wouldn’t believe the pump­kin was a pumpkiness.

My mis­sion is solely to inform you that des­pite some sug­ges­tion to the con­trary, there is no Great Pump­kin or Great Pump­kin desig­ner in the sky. The Great Pumpkin